I went to a private Christian school and went to church every Sunday as I was told. As I grew older and began the process of communion and confirmation, I began to notice a creeping doubt in my faith. I hid this for years and tried to force it out, but I couldn't hide it, I just couldn't make myself believe it. The more I researched my native religion, the more I began to notice its flaws. Once carefully hidden away from my innocent faith, the cruel history and reality of my own religion and culture suddenly became apparent. After a brief existential crisis, I realized how much easier it would be to return to Catholicism and never look back. However, I knew I would find no peace of mind in resignation. Having explored the sanctity of other religions and spiritual movements, I now find myself in a state of agnosticism, content to accept the fact that I will simply never know the