“A laotong relationship is established by choice for the purpose of emotional companionship and undying loyalty” (See 56). A friendship has many challenges, but through a strong bond between them, friends can overcome the obstacles they face together. In the book Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See, Lily and Snow Flower are laotongs who face obstacles throughout their lives. Throughout the novel, both girls must follow strict cultural practices to please Chinese society. They face the pain of stuck feet and the daily tasks that women have to do. Together, the girls face obstacles big and small that form the novel's theme of the bond between women. In this novel, one of the ways Lily and Snow Flower bonded was through learning from each other. Both girls grew up in a time when women had a boring daily routine. They spent their lives in women's rooms upstairs, far from the rest of the world, knowing only how to weave, embroider and cook. Snow Flower taught Lily something "rebellious" which broke tradition, but brought the two girls closer together. “My only rebellion came in the form of nu shu, the secret writing of our women. My first break from tradition occurred when Snow Flower – my laotong, my “old self,” my secret writing partner – sent me the fan… (2). Since Snow Flower taught Lily Nu Shu, the two girls were able to write to each other using the secret code. This form of writing was used exclusively for the use of women. If Snow Flower hadn't taught Lily Nu Shu, the girls wouldn't have been able to learn more about each other and ultimately wouldn't have had such a close bond. Meanwhile, learning from each other, Lily and Snow Flower both experienced the process of foot binding...... middle of paper ...... uh learned from Lily how to cook, wash clothes and how to clean the house. . These girls learned from each other without realizing it and created a bond between them that was even more special than they thought. After the two girls got married and had children, the two girls didn't see each other as much. Through nu shu, they were able to hold, touch and learn what was happening in their lives. “You who always knew my heart, now fly above the clouds in the warmth of the sun. I hope that one day we will fly away together” (321). Lily wrote these words in her last entry on her fan after Snow Flower's death. Despite all the lies Snow Flower told Lily, she still loved him and the bond they had together for eternity. Together, as laotongs, the girls overcame obstacles, learned from each other, and created an eternal love between women throughout this novel..